Stay Tuned/Meat the Summer

From Eccentric Flower

 



stay tuned
 



Meat the Summer
11 June 2007


Personally, I don't consider it to be summertime (when the living is easy) until about mid-June, but don't try to tell advertisers that. Somewhere around the end of May, it suddenly becomes open season on ads for citronella candles, bug repellent, barbecue grills, swim gear, backyard sporting equipment, inflatable pools, sunscreen, steaks, hamburgers, packaged potato salads, and of course hot dogs.

I eat more hot dogs than most American adults because some nights I do not have a lot of appetite, or patience with cooking, and hot dogs are a food I can always eat no matter what other conditions are in play. Hot dogs are a year-round food for me, but if one is to believe the advertisers, they are not for most other grown-ups. The only time you will see the humble tubesteak being pitched other than in the summer-barbecue context is in the football-game-tailgate-party context, where it is apparently okay to eat the summer-barbecue foods in midwinter. I don't quite understand it either.

Hot-dog advertising lends itself to wretched excess. I have collected some particularly amazing examples over the years. Here are two early returns on this year's crop.


I try to avoid the obvious anatomical metaphors one can easily fall prey to when discussing the wiener (why, there's one now!), but good heavens, sometimes something is just impossible to ignore:

Image:Longer.jpg


For our second exhibit, we have the CG-rendered Love That Dare Not Speak Its Name. It is pretty unspeakable.

Image:Frenchs.jpg

That's it for today - just wanted to sear your eyeballs a bit. Welcome to summer.



and now back to our program


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