Eccentric Flower:199901/solipsist timelines

fifteen january

solipsist timelines

Marc responded this morning in email about my history rant (two postcards back). Since his language is such a reflection of his thought process (Marc holds the patent on "thinking aloud"), I'm excerpting his reply here, with his permission, rather than paraphrasing it:

I'm slowly accumulating insights on the non-history thing, and I can say a few things, now, at least:

Let's look at what I like and see why what I avoid lacks it.

I like science mainly because information we've accumulated about physical structures is very, very internally complex. (The fact that it is complex interests me; if I can follow the subtleties, I'm pleased with my mind.) By "internally" I mean that the body of information as itself is quite complicated and interrelated. I don't immediately connect the texts with reality. History, by itself and on the surface, is no more interesting at looking at a thermometer every few weeks and jotting down the level of mercury. Other than an accounting function with cross-referencing, it holds no interesting information. [History] all boils down to a message: People act on their beliefs to get out of what they see as bad situations and maintain what they see as good situations. Sounds like TV, which I also don't watch.

I accept that there are very skewed versions of history, with some accounts being deliberately inaccurate or misleading. I recognize a certain thrill of finding out "the inside scoop." However, in my mind, even if we had transcripts from every conversation on the planet, and real-time videos of every war and event and relationship, I still doubt I'd wander through the archives. (Though the archives themselves would be fascinating. How might all that information be organized?!) Am I assuming that the study of history is noble voyeurism? Perhaps, which would connect it to other things I already avoid due to much the same apathy.

In other words, my avoidance of history may be an extension of my antisocial tendencies. If we construe a pact of non-voyeurism as a form of selfishness, I'd plead guity.

Referring back to "science," I would not mind if we were entirely wrong about everything in chemistry, biology, and physics: the picture we've created is still beautiful. Now, since I'm content to assume the information we have is largely consistent (if incomplete) with the physical universe, it carries a doubly rewarding weight in being both pretty and pretty accurate.

I'm interested in intense personal growth and mental development. This implies that my internal environment is more important than any external one. I could be living in any country, in any time, any station in life (indeed, I could be any species on any planet), I'd still be tinkering with my mind and trying to stretch it. Why bother to look up at (history) external road signs? (If I'm not next to any cliffs or maelstroms, I'm fine.)

The sciences present me with very complicated information [that steps] over the boundaries history incessantly draws and erases. If my mind can follow it all, I'm pleased. It's not so much about the content of the information as such, but its underlying structure.

Me again.

Now, I suppose you're wondering what I think of all this? Well ... I can appreciate Marc's reasons for liking science, and I think I understand his focus ... but I don't see what any of that has to do with not learning history.

However, Marc has inadvertently given me the key - the main gripe that I have with people who won't store any history. I see it as a fundamentally selfish, egocentric act. I see it as saying:

"My universe begins and ends with me. I have no need to learn about what came before me; to me that is unimportant; in fact, it may not even be real. I have no proof that anything existed before I was there to perceive it, and I have no need to care if it did."

Mary Anne and others comment on how self-denigrating I am; that is because to me, there is no sin greater than the sin of hubris - excessive pride of place. To me, the block above is purest hubris.

Send flames and comments. Tell me where I've derailed.

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