Eccentric Flower:199809/sleep is suddenly not enticing

four september ninety eight ten a m

sleep is suddenly not enticing

A funny thing the last two nights.

Usually, although I don't necessarily want to go to bed because I always have too many things I want to finish, when I do get into the bed I'm thinking like, "ooh, this'll be fun." Sleep itself is not exactly fun - I mean, maybe it is but I don't remember it so how can I tell? But drifting off slowly to sleep is fun, and the period of groggy half-awake floating in the morning is fun (as I wrote in the Very First Postcard). Moreover, the next morning usually brings responsibilities I don't want to deal with.

The point is that normally when I get into bed I am in no hurry for the next morning to get there. You see? But for the past two nights I've been finding myself thinking like, "Well, guess I'd better go get the sleep part over with ...."

Now, obviously I have no idea what today is going to bring, but yesterday certainly didn't have any fewer responsibilities than usual, nor did I go to bed on Wednesday with the knowledge that something really good was going to happen on Thursday that I just couldn't wait for ... if I were, say, going on vacation on Thursday morning I could understand being impatient with sleep on Wednesday night (actually, in a situation like that I usually can't sleep at all), but there was nothing of the sort. That I know of.

It puzzles me.

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