Eccentric Flower:199808/it isnt like that for everyone
From Eccentric Flower
«August 1998 «Eccentric Flower
 |
twelve august ninety eight noon it isn't like that for everyone lanalee, dear, I have to tell you something. Please don't take this the wrong way. Christmas isn't like this for everybody. It's your family. Admittedly there are quite a few people who find that a period of forced confinement with the relatives is less than salubrious, and I agree that the crazed commercialism of the season is something we could all live without, but you have to understand that yours is something of a minority perspective. I've been Up Here nearly five years now. My entire family (my entire maternal family, that is) is in the south. I didn't realize how much I'd miss them until I did. More importantly, being the family weirdo, I didn't realize how much they'd miss me. We aren't required to bring gifts for anyone. In fact, since we're basically a poor family, no one really is expected to be amazingly forthcoming with the gifts. The important thing to bring is yourself. And your appetite, since we all like to eat and several of us like to cook as well. My true love dislikes noise and small children - and my family has plenty of both. Yet she loves Christmas with them. She can hide in the kitchen and help my mother (who's delighted, since she usually gets stuck with most of the cooking) and everyone understands. The trick is to have an environment where you can be honest about your likes and dislikes. Being around my family is a bad environment to keep secrets in - we're all incorrigible gossips - so everything comes out sooner rather than later. We may argue at the tops of our lungs, but we settle all disputes quickly. So ... Christmas doesn't have to be like that. And if you really can't bear being around your family, why not just refuse to go? I'm aware that takes a certain amount of stone-heartedness. I cannot fend off accusations that I may have a cold-blooded streak, since I haven't spoken to anyone on my father's side of the family for several years. Still, I seldom regret that decision - ultimately it's my misery that's at stake, not theirs, and frankly I don't imagine they notice my absence much. © columbine |
